Y’all…it’s hot out there!

If you are one that has been in the office with me more than a couple of times, it is very likely that the conversation (small talk) at some point has ventured to the weather. That being the case you are probably aware that I am not a cold weather guy, not at all. I’ve even been heard saying that I am a “hot and humid” kind of guy. While that is true, I do have to say –”y’all, it’s hot out there.” Of course this is true of relationships also. 

Hot you say? Yes, I have had several couples in the office lately that say that things are progressing very well in the relationship. So much that they feel a closeness that has not been for a while –the coldness (the absence of US) has left and the warmth (the presence of US) in the relationship is back. Just one of the foundational things that helps bring this back is having slow conversations where understanding is the goal. I wish I could say that this is the only type of hot that has been reported in the relationships in the office; but it isn’t. 

Others have reported and demonstrated that things are July/August kind of hot –that unbearable heat and humidity that is smothering. At times, we are so greatly challenged to understand one another that all it does is increase the friction and tension, raising the temperature beyond safe levels. The ‘time out skill’ is very important in these times, as well as the slow conversations with understanding being the goal –NOT right or wrong, or winning and losing. When things get too hot, slow it down and create a little space; be mindful to yield and embrace HREG (Humility, Respect, Empathy, and Goodwill) and things will likely go better. 

If you find yourself/your relationship struggling with the ‘heat of the relationship’ maybe it’s time to schedule some time in the office. Let’s contain the heat and make it work for the relationship rather than against it. 

If you find yourself struggling with the heat in the relationship right now and you need someone to come alongside you to help you, give us a call. At Brown Counseling and Coaching we consider it a privilege to walk this journey with you. Give us a call 904-885-0215 or schedule a time with us at this LINK. We look forward to seeing you in the office.